ScienceWork Recounts







On this page you will find our class’s recounts about our excursion to ScienceWorks.

We would love for you to read our work and leave us some warm and cool feed back. An example of how we give feedback is demonstrated below to help you.

Dear Miss Ash,

Each paragraph in your recount has a clear topic sentence and you provided lots of detail that related to the main idea of the paragraph. To improve your writing review how to use commas to break up sentences.

Thank-you, your feedback will help us further improve our writing.

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on “ScienceWork Recounts
69 Comments on “ScienceWork Recounts
  1. Science works 29/7/13

    On Tuesday the 23 of July the level 4’s went to science works. We went there for a excursion we got there by bus because it is a long way away.

    When we got we ate at the front where the buses were then a guide took us to a semi circle seated area were you eat so we ate there. when we finished we went to All Electronics to look at different things like a bike radio, water power and wind power and lots more.

    Then at 11:00 we went to the lightning show were they showed when lighting is near and created lighting. Then they showed If you were safe when lighting struck when you are in a plane , car , under a tree ,playing golf or under a shake. In the plane and the car you are safe but playing golf and standing under a tree are unsafe but with the shake you are not safe but with a metal cord hanging from it you are safe. She tested this with a tesla .

    Then we ate again. When we finished we went to Cool Stuff the guy there showed us liquid nitrogen and he test things like how does a banana hammer a glue take nail. Then after that we went to the sports area. That was my favourite. First we went to the football the to the baseball where you have to see how fast you through the ball i through it 56 km. then we did these small tests to see how high you jump and how strong and fast you where.

    So what I thought that this was the best excursion ever. I had a great day my favourite things were the lightning show, cool stuff and the sports area.

    by Caleb

    • Dear Caleb,
      I think your recount was very descriptive and detailed. In some parts you’ve mad some mistakes such as “We went there for our excursion we got there by bus”. I think you should have used a full stop or comma.

    • Hi Caleb,
      I think that your story is great,I liked how you described every single bit. W What I think you could improve on is your punctuation.I found a few spots where you could have put some commas,
      Other than that I think it was great.

  2. My Science works excursion
    On Tuesday the 2nd week of term 3 our level went to science works for our excursion. We drove in the bus all the way to the the city. When we first got there we had morning tea for 15 mints and then we went to this
    area where it has science technology. After we went to the lightning show
    that show us how lightning and thunder works and how lightning strikes.

    Later we went to have lunch with the other schools that were there and after we went to the toilets and went to play at the playground at the back
    of science works. After we went to sports work which is in science works.
    After we went to the science room that teaches us about solid liquids and gases. After we went back to school and went home. By Jayden E
    The end

  3. Science works!!

    On the 23rd of July the whole level 4 went to science work by bus. The reason why we went to science works was to learn about solids, liquids and gases. We went to cool stuff in science works.

    On the 23rd of July the whole level 4 went to science works, we went to science works by bus. The best thing we went to in science works was cool stuff, we did one community at a time. At cool stuff there was this guy named Daniel. Daniel showed us what liquid nitrogen does to different objects, one of the things he showed us what happens when you put glu tack does if you put liquid nitrogen.

    One of the really cool things he showed us was when you put cold water into a glass bottle and pour out the cold water and put the glass into a bucket of hot water and put a balloon over the bottle it will make the balloon inflate.

    Another thing he showed us was what happened when you put liquid nitrogen over a balloon. When you put liquid nitrogen on top of a balloon was it would make the balloon lose all of its air but if you blew on the balloon it will inflate back up.

    Finally Daniel showed us what happens when you put liquid nitrogen on a
    bouncy ball. When you put liquid nitrogen on a bouncy ball was it won’t be bouncy anymore it will turn really hard. If you wait about 10 minutes the ball will turn back to soft and bouncy.

    After Daniel showed us the hard bouncy ball we got in a line and left cool stuff. After cool stuff we got to go to the sports area for 30 min. Then we could go on the bus and head back to school.

    By Jayce

    • Dear Jayce,

      Your recount gave me an image of what the various things looked like,it was descriptive and it had lots of information. However in the first and second paragraph I found it repetitive as you repeated the date part of your reason.

    • Dear Jayce,

      Your recount was interesting and I liked how you explained everything that happened at Cool Stuff. Although, you need to use more capital letters in your recount and also need to talk more about what else happened during your trip to Science Works.

      From: Cecilia

  4. Science works recount-Robert

    The 23rd of July was enjoyable as the level four’s went to science works for an excursion to learn more about solids,liquids and gases.when we got there we went up stairs to look at the various machines the Science works have set up.The machines were fascinating as they each did a separate thing such as explaining air and light energy. But as the voices of our teachers sounded,everyone went to line up with their ‘mums’ or teachers.

    We then had to Go to watch the lighting show,we were introuduced to the two people who were in charge of the show itself. We saw things that Different machines did,such as ‘The Vandograph’ and ‘The can crusher’.Addy was told to take the crushed can back to class.other things we saw were magnetic rocks that they use in compasses.As we left we said our goodbyes to only see different machines Perform different things.

    A few minutes later we went to ‘cool stuff’ which was hosted by Daniel,a funny person who thought us mostly about Liqud nitrogen.Liqud Nitrogen is a very dangerous Liqud as it is cold to about -160 degrees C,it could burn skin,deflate balloons,shrink objects and make certain items very brittle.We learnt that not all liquids do not have the same boiling or freezing point,as Liqud Nitrogen boils at room temperature And its freezing Point is way below water’s.We exited the room as cool stuff concluded but there was more things to.

    I measured my height,armspan,heart rate,jump height,hand-eye cordination,grip strength and many other things.Science works had a lot of fun things to Do but the sound of the teachers calling our names meant time to go back to school and talking to someone on the bus the whole way,all of us walked down stairs And I really needed to drink water,as I lined up for the water i looked around to see the other schools leave.drinking the water was a refreshing state but I knew I had to let my classmates have a drink aswell.I hoped off the stool,but Jimmy was concerned,then we both realise that our group had gone to the bus.

    With the aid of the teacher,Jimmy and I found the bus and the rest of our class and headed on the bus.It was a long way back to school,but ScienceWorks was cool.I had to talk with Jimmy on the way,but that was fine,as long as we had something to talk about such as game I felt speed humps I also felt that we were going back to school,once we got back there was nothing to do except talk about what we did.It was a fun experience to go to ScienceWorks and learn more about science.

  5. ScienceWorks Excursion

    On Tuesday, Week 2 of this term, Level 5 & 6 went to ScienceWorks. We went there because we wanted to finish off the rest of our learning for our ERP topic last term, Solids, Liquids & Gases. Lots of parent helpers came and we were all taken by the transport of bus. It was a gigantic place to explore!
    When we got there we were given our ‘Mums’ for the day. We had to stay with them for the rest of the day whenever we split up. Everyone got together when we were in one place such as, outside. We sat and ate our food for about 5-10 mins and then met our ‘Mums’ and lined up. There were about 8 ‘Mums’ all together to keep us safe.
    First we went to where all the interesting stuff was, where everything random was put together in one place to see. There were a lot of things that were really cool, like how windmill energy is made. Also how you make static electricity by rubbing your hands on a plastic surface with polystyrene balls inside, and how the balls react. There was also a part in the random Inventions where it shows you how you see through ‘fly eyes’. It was really cool and I totally enjoyed it.
    After the inventions, we walked outside and all the way around to the shed of the Lightning Room. The lady first introduced herself and showed us some really interesting pictures from her show ‘Bolt from the Blue’. She explained to us what static electricity is and turned on a globe that attracted static electricity and it was really cool. Alana was picked to stand next to the globe and it was pretty funny because, Alana’s hair was standing on end! The lady then told us to block our ears and turned on her Lightning Striker that showed us the effects it had when it hit a plane, a car, a girl under a tree and a lady under a bus shelter. It was really loud! We all had so much fun.
    We went outside to eat for about 5-10 mins and went with our ‘Mums’ in a group to see a show called Cool Stuff. Daniel was our host in this show and he was really funny. He showed us his liquid hydrogen thermos and what it did to plain water and water with detergent. It all turned to ice! Daniel showed us what happens when he puts cold water in a bottle and puts that bottle in hot water, with a balloon on the top. He reversed that and it showed really different reactions. He put a blown up balloon in a bowl and poured liquid hydrogen on it. As soon as the cold air hit it, it started to deflate! It was also really funny because the volunteers had to blow on it so that it doesn’t shrink. It was so much fun and we all laughed.
    We exited the Science Stage, and we were outside of the SportsWorks area. We were told that we could go in, so everyone went in to explore. There was a part of the section where you have a chance to race on a track and beat Cathy Freeman’s record of 00:02. Most people beat it and I certainly know I did! There was another section about soccer keeping and I didn’t do very well, but that’s okay.
    In the end, everyone had a lot of fun and we all enjoyed Scienceworks. There were a lot of things to explore in the Inventions area and it was so cool. Our ‘Mums’ were really helpful throughout the whole day, and the made sure we didn’t get lost. The Lightning Room was absolutely the best part of ScienceWorks and it was really loud. The show, Cool Stuff, was really informative and I learnt a lot about Solids, Liquids & Gases. The SportsWorks section was so fun and it was even better when I bet Cathy Freeman’s record! The outside eating area was so cool because it was so massive! I really liked ScienceWorks and I hope to come again.

    • Dear Sandra,

      Your recount was very descriptive as you have described ScienceWorks on the inside and the out side.You wrote on a certain thing and then you focused on the topic.

      I found a bit of punctuation errors such as some places where you could replace full stops with commas.

    • Dear Sandra,

      Your recount was very good and I liked the how you wrote your opinion, such as, ‘it was so much fun’.

      To improve your writing you need to organise your writing into paragraphs to make it clearer.

      From, Lucia

    • Dear Sandra,
      Your Science works recount was really interesting and descriptive.You could have made your work easier to read by putting it into paragraphs, but apart from that your recount was really good.


  6. Hello everyone this is my Science Works recount,

    My Trip to Science Works

    On Tuesday on the second week of term 3, level 4 went to Science Works to learn something new. We left for Science Works by bus after everyone. We were all excited and couldn’t wait to go there. It was a long ride but finally we got there.

    The first thing we did was head to the electricity show. It showed us all about technology, energy and lots of other things. The first thing I did was become Big Brother. A camera was somewhere in the room and was connected to a screen where we could look around. My friends and I kept looking around and saw what was happening .We even saw Mrs. P dance. There were lots of other cool things like a game thing where you control a joystick and try to collect cars with magnets attached to them.

    After lunch we headed for the lighting show it was one the coolest things that was there. We practiced covering our ears because the person running the lighting show said there was going to be loud noises. Soon the show began and the women who were running the show explained about lighting and sparks, and showed slowed down footage about different types of lighting. Then she talked about static electricity and what it does to us. Then she showed the can crusher which can crush a can using a little spark. At the end of the show we looked at how lighting can travel through metal and other things.

    The last show we looked at was the cool stuff show. The cool stuff show was about solid, liquids and gases. The man who did the show was named Daniel and he used ‘cool’ things like liquid nitrogen. I learnt that liquid nitrogen was so cold it burns!

    So at the end we said goodbye to science works and for school. It was a fun and cool way of learning. I hope the coming years will enjoy this just like we did.

    Thank you for reading.

    • Dear Himeth,
      You had lots of detail in each paragraph and were explaining everything important at ScienceWorks. I really enjoyed when you said you saw Mrs. P dance. Next time you could have worked on your tense.

      From Jamie

    • Dear Himeth,
      I like your recount how you described what you did in the electrical room, like being “Big Brother”.

      It could’ve been better if all paragraphs had the same amount of words and detail, because your second last paragraph was shorter than all of the other events.

  7. Dear Class,

    This is my recount, hope you like it.

    An excursion to Science Works!!!

    Last Tuesday my class had an excursion to Science Works. It took us about an hour to get there. We travelled by bus to Science works. We had to pack our water bottle ad some food. When we got on the bus it was very hot.

    I sat at the very back where there were few heaters. My bus buddy was Daniel K and he was telling me jokes and stuff. Soon after we were close to the city where Science Works was. When we were in the city I saw an orange Lamborghini that wasn’t being driven at the time. When we got to science works we had to line up with our group mum.

    We worked our way around Science Works and eventually found the Lightning Room! In the lightning room we had to sit down in seats and listen to the lady that was in charge. There was a new show called “BOLT FROM THE BLUE” which was about how lightning is formed and different types of lightning. We got to see real Electricity on a Tesla coil zapping things and for me that was the coolest bit of the show!

    Next we went in another show called “COOL STUFF” and it was to do with Solids, Liquids and Gases. Most of the experiments he did were mixed with liquid Nitrogen which is -60 degrees Celsius. One of the coolest experiments he did was mixing water and detergent with liquid Nitrogen. It made a huge bubbly mess but the liquid Nitrogen froze the bubbles. It looked like magic, fairy dust if you will.

    Overall that was one of the best science works visits I have ever been to!

    By Tristan

    • Dear Tristan,

      I really like the third and fourth paragraphs because they have a topic sentence that introduces what that paragraph is about and then you have more detail about that one thing.

      I think you could improve your introduction by using a variety of simple and compound sentences rather than only simple sentences. You should also work on your conclusion which should be a paragraph in itself.

      Miss Ash

    • Dear Tristan

      I really liked your the way you set the it out and explained what you did clearly.You don’t need to put whole word in capital letters.besides that the recount was good

      by Caleb

  8. Dear Reader,

    This is my recount for our ScienceWorks excursion. Enjoy!

    ScienceWorks Excursion

    On the 23rd of July, 2013, the level 4’s went to ScienceWorks. We were there because we had been learning about solids, liquids and gases and how they change state, so, ScienceWorks would be sure to give us the rest of the information we needed to complete our ERP work.

    So I arrived at school that Tuesday morning, full of excitement. I was really looking forward to ScienceWorks because last time I was there I had so much fun. Once it was time to go to class we put our lunches in our class tubs and sat on the floor. The teachers then explained a little bit about what we were doing and what mum we were with. They told us we were going to see to a show called Cool Stuff and another called The Lightning Show.Then we were asked to line up so we could get ready to walk out. Once we started walking the line broke and turned into a bunch. Everyone was with their friends, talking. We got on the bus and everybody sat down with their friends and, once again started talking.

    It was a long drive, but, we got there in the end. Once everyone was off we were asked to line up in our groups, with the mums we were given. We were all hungry so we walked into ScienceWorks and found an area to sit and eat. We had to get foam seats because the concrete had bird poo on it, and nobody wanted to sit on it. We sat down grabbed our lunch started eating. I sat with, Sue, Mary’s mum. After that we walked into an area that was all about how things work. The other community got to go into the sports area but our community wasn’t, we were going later. I enjoyed explorng that area. I didn’t read everything because we had to go to the Lightning Show afterwards and I wanted see everything here first. The teachers and our group mum’s then called us together and said we were going to our first show.

    I was really excited and curious about what we were going to see. All I knew was that it was about lightning, but what about lightning. We arrived and I was hoping to get front row but I got second which was still pretty good. Everyone was settled so now it was time for the show. A lady came out and explained to us what the show was about and that at some point, during the show, we would have to block our ears. We learnt about lightning and the different types. We also learnt about what things lightning could get to. For example lightning can get to metal, wood, humans and many other things. After that it was lunch!

    Everyone had, had their lunch and the other community was seeing that show later, but our community was going to see the cool stuff show now. We were a little early so we went outside and played with our friends. Then we went back inside and saw the cool stuff show. The guy, Daniel, showed us what liquid nitrogen could do to objects and he also warned us not to touch it because it was really dangerous. Daniel dipped half a banana and some bluetac, in the shape of a nail, in some liquid nitrogen. then he hammered the bluetac with the banana into a piece of foam and it went straight through like a normal nail!

    After that we went into the sports section and everyone did Cathy Freeman, which was where you had to run against her (it was a screen with her running), her time was 2 seconds but it was a short track. I did a few more activities and then were told it was time to go. I was devastated because I had so much fun, I didn’t want to go back to school. We went back to school and were a bit early and so we just talked about what we had learnt, then the bell went and everybody went home exhausted.


    • Dear Kristen,

      Your recount was interesting and each paragraph was very detailed. To improve your writing, you need to double check where you put your commas because there were some that weren’t needed.

      For example, ‘it was a long drive,but,we got there in the end’ doesn’t need a comma after the word but.

      From, Lucia

  9. Dear Readers,

    This is my recount about the Level 4 excursion to ScienceWorks.

    The ScienceWorks Excursion

    Last Tuesday, the Level 4 students and teachers went on a excursion to ScienceWorks. We were having an excursion at ScienceWorks because we were going to learn about solids, liquids abpnd gases. At ScienceWorks, Level 4 and teachers went to the Lightning Room, a show called ‘Cool Stuff’ and much more. We came to ScienceWorks by bus.

    Before we began to go into ScienceWorks, we ate our snack so during the activities so we don’t miss out on some of the amazing activities. We saw other schools entering ScienceWorks and came here to learn as well! Everyone was very excited and can not wait to go do the interesting activities. After eating for fifteen minutes, our two communities separated and went to different sections of ScienceWorks.

    Everyone was excited to have a first glimpse of one of the activities. The things feature were a large glass ball and whenever someone places a finger on the ball, small, purple lightning zaps appeared. The facts and activities in the area were fascinating, very interesting And intruded almost everyone. Some of the activities were: plucking a guitar to see how high the pitch is, seeing how a fly sees by looking into a type of tube and much, much more bazaar things that we did nt know.

    Half an hour later, our community gathered together to go to the ‘Lightning Room’. The people who did not know about the lightning show was talking to other people, trying to guess what it was. In the room a woman introduced the Level 4 to the show. – Which was called ‘Bolt from the Blue’. The woman explained that the show was about lightning bolts, storms and what types of lightning bolts there are. I was very fascinated about the show because the woman told us that if a lightning bolt hot sand, the sand will turned into a fragile rock which was lumpy. The show was interesting and everyone laughed when a Level 4 student’s hair started to go up.This happened because if someone climbed to the top of a mountain, there is less oxygen and our hair starts to go up.

    After the show, everyone was chatting about the show in the Lightning Room. Our community headed to a small room where a man introduced us to another show called ‘Cool Stuff’. The man was very funny and told us about liquid hydrogen. Everyone was intruded as the man told us that the liquid hydrogen boils at room temperature. The man also chosen two volunteers to do an experiment with him. Beside the man was a large yellow balloon. First, he carefully poured the liquid hydrogen on the balloon, everyone was saying ‘wow’ and ‘ahh’ as the balloon started to shrink. Quickly, he rushed to the two volunteers and told bothe if them to blow on the balloon as fast as they could. As soon the two volunteers blowed on the shrinking balloon, the balloon started to go back to its original size! After the show, everyone was say how cool the show was.

    That was a part of what we done at ScienceWorks. There is so much that I want to talk about that I can not even remember what happened next! The excursion was amazing and I loved it.


    • Dear Cecilia,

      I liked your detail and how you had a topic sentence for each paragraph. I thought you could have put more punctuation for example commas to break up the sentence.

    • Dear Cecilia,

      I liked your sentence structure and you had good wording each sentence. You had a couple of words that were wrong or incorrectorly mispelt.

      But, overall it was a good report!

      from tristan

  10. Cool Stuff

    On the 23rd of July the Level 5 & 6 went to ScienceWorks. We went to the Science Theatre where we saw the show “Cool Stuff”. Cool Stuff is all about cool stuff and doing experiments using liquid hydrogen.

    As we got to the Science Theatre I was excited to see what would happen. Daniel, the host of Cool Stuff, was explaining what liquid hydrogen is. He said it was a liquid that is – 100 degrees. The experiment he did was pour the liquid hydrogen into the water. The water almost completely froze and if we waited a bit longer it would completely freeze. Next he got some hot water put a ballon over it and poured liquid hydrogen over it and the ballon went inside the bottle.

    After he did those experiments he got an already blown balloon and he poured liquid hydrogen over it. Before that he got two volunteers which were Andrew & Sandra. The ballon shrunk and the volunteers blew on it and it became like they actually blew the ballon.

    Daniel said he could nail a glue tack nail into a cellophane wall with a banana! He got two people to make glue tack nails. Once he did that he put the banana and glue tack nails into the liquid hydrogen. He took the items out and actually nailed them!

    To conclued we had a great time and we got to see some experiments using liquid hydrogen! I’m sure that everyone learnt something new that day because of the show. That was the last show we went to so after that we got on the bus and went back to school. I still can’t believe that liquid hydrogen is -100! That is amazing that I went somewhere fun but still learnt a lot of things from lightning to liquid hydrogen.

    • Dear Jamie,

      I found your recount enjoyable as it was descriptive,you had detail on the science and the balloon.I found a spelling mistake in balloon as you spelt it ‘ballon’ but over all it was a good recount.

      From Robert

    • Dear Jamie,

      I really liked your recount, it was very descriptive and entertaining. I think you need to improve your spelling and your vocabulary, I thought your words were to simple but overall, great job.


  11. Dear Bloggers,

    On the 23rd of July, 2013, the level 4’s went to Science Works for our
    excursion. At school we are learning about solids, liquids and gases and
    how matter changes its state. Part of Science Works shows you all about
    how matter changes its state and about how liquid nitrogen works, which of
    course would be perfect lessons for our E.R.P

    As soon as I got to school that morning I was so excited about going to
    Science Works to learn and explore new things. I was also exited because
    my mum was coming with us. While the teachers were marking the role
    everybody was thinking about how much fun we were going to have. After the
    teachers made sure everything was packed we all got in the bus. Everybody
    started screaming with excitement all the way there.

    It was a long drive but we got there eventually. When we got there the
    first thing we did was eat our recess. We didn’t want to waste time so as
    soon as everyone was finished and in our groups we set off to learn.
    Everybody was scattered everywhere because there were so many amazing
    things to see. The first thing that got my eye was a petal powered radio.
    It was tiring but awesome at the same time.

    When we were all done looking at the amazing things that were in the room
    we went to a show. Nobody knew what the show was about so we thought
    curiously, but when we got there it was a whole different thing, it was a
    lightening show. They showed us how to make fog and how lightning happens.
    They also showed us what lightening is most likely to hit and what it’s
    not likely to hit.

    After that we went back to the arena to eat our lunch, by then everyone
    was starving. When we were all done eating our lunch we quickly went to
    “Cool Stuff” and watched someone do all these amazing science experiments.
    He also asked us what we thought was going to happen next but nobody had a

    After that we went back to the arena to get all our things and put them on
    the bus ready to go back to school. Once again the bus was as noisy as a
    zoo. Everyone was so tired that we nearly fell asleep. By the time we got
    back to school we couldn’t wait to go home.


    • Dear Perry,
      Your recount was very descriptive and it had great words in it. I recommend that you work a bit more on spelling and punctuation, otherwise it was absolutely great!

      From Sandra :).

    • Dear Perry,

      I’m really amazed by your recount. I found it interesting because you used really good description and similes, especially at the end where you said the bus was like a zoo. One thing you could improve is your sentece structure and whether your sentences make sense or not.
      Overall your recount was really amazing.


    • Dear Perry,
      I think your recount was great and I liked how you used a simile at the end but you need to work on your spelling and re read before you publish it in any way but there was only a few mistakes but it was good.

      From Joanne

  12. dear readers
    this is my recount to Science Works

    A DAY AT Science WORKS

    On Tuesday we went to Science Works we were all very excited when we got on the bus. We all wanted to see what we could do. While we were going to Sciences Works we were very bored because it was very long drive.
    When we got there we went in and went to some activity’s using electricity I was so amazed with the activity’s. We looked around the other activity’s there was so much to do there I did wind powered energy. It was very big and I almost got lost. When were done we went outside to eat our lunch we talked about all the activity’s.
    When we were ready we went to watch the lightning show. When we got in we took our seats and the show started we talked about how lightning is made. Then she showed us how to make a cloud using a bottle then she showed some static electricity with hair it was very funny. She talked about some electricity conductors like metal, humans and wood she showed us that you could make music with electricity.
    When the show finished we went outside and went to watch cool stuff which was talking about liquid nitrogen to make solids, liquids and gases it was funny because he used liquid nitrogen to make some ice. He started to ask us questions on what would happen when he used some liquid nitrogen on a metal loop with a ball connected by a string and when he pulled it out the loop had shrunk and the ball wouldn’t go through then he froze a rubber ball and when he pulled it out it was frozen and then he wacked it with a hammer and it broke. For the last act he said he would use a bit of blue tack and a cut banana to put the nail through some paper by freezing the blue tack and banana in liquid nitrogen and it worked.
    When we had to go back to school we were all happy that we learnt something and when we were on the bus I fell asleep and we all got bored again. I woke up when we were back at school and I wasn’t tired anymore. We talked about what we learnt at Science work we all had something to share.


    • Dear Evan,

      Your recount about the excursion to ScienceWorks was very interesting and I really enjoyed reading it. The paragraph about the lightning show was amazing and you must have enjoyed going to the show very much! Although, your paragraphs are squished together which makes it very difficult to read. You also need to look out for the punctuation at the start of your recount.


      • Dear Evan,

        Your recount was really good, I liked the way you described how you felt and what it was like. Some things you could improve are your sentence structures and your description of the event. You also need to re-read each sentence as some of your sentences didn’t make sense.


  13. Joanne
    Science show
    July 23rd we went to science works and did a lot of things. We went to the lightning show, looked at how electricity works and looked at the science in sport but my favourite thing we did is when we went to the science show.

    So we were heading for the science show and when we got there we saw a few bottles, some objects and some containers with liquids. Then a man whose name was Daniel came and introduced himself and started talking to us. Then he showed some nitrogen and put it in a container and a fog came out of the container which was cool.

    Then he showed us a container with detergent and water and poured nitrogen into the container and bubbles came out but inside the water had frozen because the nitrogen is so cold that it freezes the water so quickly.
    Then he asked to volunteers to come up and put some goggles on. Then he put some nitrogen on a balloon and asked them to blow on the balloon and before they blew on it the balloon was small but when they blew on the balloon it became normal size. Then he put a rubber ball in the nitrogen and when he took it out he folded it into a serviette and smashed with a hammer.

    So then it was time to say goodbye to Daniel. Then before we left he said we could take some nitrogen home but when he put the lid on the container it came off so we couldn’t take it home. That was the science show. Joanne

  14. Trip to ScienceWorks

    It was Tuesday on the second week of school; we were going to Science
    Works. For me it was my first time so I was really excited. We first went
    on to our bus to Science Works, as we got on the teacher counted us one by
    one I sat down next to a friend and took the window side.

    Once we arrived at Science Works, we had to line up with our Mums. After
    walking and walking, we finally found ourselves sitting down and eating
    lunch in a gigantic place. Lunch wasn’t very long I finished pretty fast
    because I didn’t each much at all.

    After lunch, we went on with the shows. My personal favourite show was the
    “Cool Stuff” the man there was named Daniel he was a pretty funny guy. At
    cool stuff we got to see things like Liquid Nitrogen and cool experiments
    to do with water, some to do with balloon and seeing stuff shrink in cold

    My favourite parts and experiments were when Daniel pretended to give us
    liquid nitrogen but the lid kept on popping off, when he froze a rubber
    ball then smashed it with a hammer. Lastly when he was playing with the
    balloons, and asked us questions.

    It was finally time to get back onto the bus and go back to school. I had
    a fun day at Science works, mostly because we didn’t do much school work,
    it was also fun learning a few stuff from science works.

    • Dear Dan,

      I liked how you said this was your first time going to ScienceWorks as this was also my first time.You used a good range of words and your punctuation.There were a few words that you repeated over and over like finally.

      From Rob

  15. Scince works Recount
    Last Tuesday the level fours went to scince works.We went there because it was for our E.R.P project work for soilds liquids and gases.Every one was so excited. It was so noisy on the bus but luckily I wasn’t sitting in the back because that was where all of the noise was coming from. We finally arrived at scince works. Our guardians for the day called there groups out so then they can see if there whole group was there.We went to sit down to eat our snack before we explored scince works.

    First we went to the electronics area where we saw how stuff work, who invented them and how stuff use to look like in the olden days. I saw this machine how it’s a bike but when you peddle it makes music. Then I found this machine which how they used to make music with its how you move your hand up and down to change the pitch of the song and then you move your hands long wise and it changes the beat of the music.

    Next we went to watch the lighting show which is called bolt from the blue. It showed us where is the safetest to be when theres lighting.They had this big machine which sounded Looked liked lighting.They had this big machine that sounded like lighting and sparked like it to.Thay had all of these different stations one was a groovy lady under a bus shelter,a lady in her car,an aeroplane, a man holding a golf stick up and a little girl leaning on a tree.The safetest place to be is in a car but not touching the outside because it is metal and you can get electrocute. They showed us lighting in all different countries.

    After the lighting show we went to sports works.They had so many different axctivities to do.I bet cathy freeman to run in this compitition how two people to against cathy freeman and see who wins.Next to the cathy freeman compitition there was rock climing it was so much fun.I went all the way to the top but it wasn’t that tall.My friend Alana told me that you can play netball,basketball,baseball and that you can be a soccer goaly.I played in netball I scored 2 points and as me being a soccer goaly I saved 1 goal.

    Then sadly we had to go back to school every body wanted to stay.Luckily it wasn’t noisy because every body was so tired from the day that we had.When we arrived back at school we sat on the floor and discussed what we did that day.Finally the bell rang so everybody can go home and rest.

    • Dear Elli,
      You science works recount was very detailed and had alot of punctuation it it. But you really need to read over each paragraph and sentences because you had a lot of spelling mistakes in them.

      From Alana

    • Dear Elli,

      Your recount was really detailed and included a lot of information about what we did and what we saw.One thing that you needed to include was probably the names of all the things you were talking about. But apart from that you wrote a great recount!

      From Taylah

  16. Last week on Tuesday level four went on an excursion to science works; to get there we went on a bus that goes through the city for a while to get to science works. All of the level four students were so excited to go there it was a long trip but finally, we arrived and had a little snack.

    My favourite part was when we went to the sports section (sports works) ,there were many different things to do but first I raced against Kathy freeman and won. Then there was this goalie training thing where you get to watch a 3d movie that helps you be a goalie.

    I also took a very, very long test which measures your height, arm span, weight and even how high you can jump .They also wanted to know far you can see , how much weight you can pull, your pulse and how long you can balance and how far you can stretch.

    I also learnt that static electricity is in lightning which leads me to the lightning show! In the lightning show the lady made sparks which looked and acted like lightning to hit a bunch of things like trees, planes, cars and bus stops. We learnt that lightning will hit you if you are under a tree because trees are tall and lighting will hit the tree then kill you.

    I had a great time at science works because I learnt lots of things about lighting, electricity, liquid nitrogen and muscles in our body and many other things. I would definitely go again because I had so much fun.

    By Taylah

    • Dear Taylah ,
      I really liked your story about science works because described the things you were doing and how you felt about it but you could have put a bit more information because your recount was a bit to short but I still really liked it.

      From Joanne

    • Dear Taylah,
      Your story was very good and detailed you had lots of big words which made it even better. But you need to check the sentences more because you had some spelling mistakes.

      From Alana

    • Dear Taylah,
      I really liked your recount about ScienceWorks because you described the thing you were doing and how you felt about it but could have put a bit more information because it was a bit to short but I really liked it.

      From Joanne

  17. Science Works

    Last Tuesday, level 5/6 went to Science Works, which was lots of fun. We went there by bus with the teachers and some parent helpers. We did lots of things, but my favourite was the lightning show, ‘Bolt From The Blue’.

    First of all, we went in this Big room with lots of chairs lined up in rows and A table. Behind the table was a huge cage with mannequins and some weird machines. I wondered what they were for, but I had to wait and see! We all sat down and a lady introduced herself to everyone. Her name was Suzie and she was going to run the show.

    She started off the show by talking about lightning and showed us some videos and pictures. Then she asked for a volunteer to help her with an experiment. Next she showed us a big ball that had static running through it and asked for another volunteer. She chose Alana and asked her to take her hair out, then told her to stand next to the big ball. This made Alana’s hair stick up, because of the static electricity! Suzie then showed us melted sand, which got melted from lightning.

    Then it was time for Suzie to show us what the things behind the cage were for. There was a demonstration of what would happen if lightning hit an airplane, a lady in a car, a man with a golf club, a kid under a tree and a person under a bus shelter, which was done with mannequins. Only the first two were safe because they had special insulation, but if the mannequins had their hand out of the window, the lightning would go straight for the hand. The others weren’t safe because they had no protection and the lightning was attracted to the person instead of the object they were under.

    Finally, the show came to an end. Suzie said goodbye and thanked us for coming. We were allowed to go up to the table and touch the melted sand, so I did. It felt hard and bumpy, and I would never have thought it was sand! Then we left the room and got ready to do some more exploring!

    • Hi Lucia ,
      Your recount was great and it included lots of adjectives .
      Next time you write your recount you clu.d possibly make your introduction longer and the same with your conclusion , other than that your recount was gun to read .
      From Maddie

      • Hi Lucia ,
        Your recount was great and it included lots of adjectives.
        Next time you write your recount you could possibly make your introduction longer and the same with your conclusion.
        Other than that your post was fun to read .
        From Maddie

  18. On Tuesday level 4 went on a excursion to ScienceWorks . First we went on the bus to go to science work. After the bus ride we hope out of the bus and Went in side ScienceWorks. First we ate our breakfast. There was a lot of people there. The level 4 had to sit in a round place it look like a circus ring.

    After we went to see the lighting show.The show was amazing I favourite part is when the lady pop the can of coke and the machine that create lighting. The lighting was very loud and it shocked through many things like a tree and others but the show is very loud so be careful. They showed us photo of lighting and lighting strike over 100 time per second and their was a photo that a lighting stirke Melbourne city and the lighting was big. I have learnt a lot about lighting like some lightIng can like do a split and then stirke the ground.

    After we went to the Cool stuff show. My favourite part was when Daniel got the hammer and broke a hard rubber ball. We learn lots of things about liquid nitrogen. And Daniel put a metal in liquid nitrogen and then the metal shank It was amazing that the metal shank then he got a bottle and put liquid nitrogen them the lid pop open four times. The cool stuff Is very fun and funny to go to. Daniel put a broken half banana in Liquid nitrogen and it turn solid and he froze the gluetack and he nailed the glue tack with a banana.

    After we went to the sport area. I love the snowboarding ride it was fun and I love the area how to you can see your height and how strong you are.then I try to beat Cathy Freeman but I did not beat her. Then I want to the 3D scoocer goal keeper it was hard and fun.And I try to handball the ball in a goal. After I test my my balance. My balance was good and I had fun at that actives.

    Later on we went back on the bus and went back to school.Then we made it back to school. I was tired and lazy back I had one hour left to home time.

    • Dear Jimmy,

      Your recount was good how you spoke about your favourite parts and not just everything you did.

      I found it a little difficult to read sometimes because of your tense you wrote in your recount, it sometimes got confusing.


    Scienceworks was amazing! When our whole level went there, everyone had great time even if it was boring or exciting. Most of things there looked really old, but some of it did look modern and new. For example the sun dial, it was a clock used in olden times and was in a modern model.

    What we did first was the lightning show; there was a lot of things that were in there. But as we kept watching we found out alot more about lightning and eventually saw everything in the auditorium. As we sat in there my earring back fell off and I had to search for it while the show was on. Luckily Joanne’s Mum had a torch and let me borrow it. In the end I didn’t find it.

    As we kept going our feet started getting sore, but the walk was worth it. The next place that our community went was the cool stuff show. The presenter, Daniel did a whole show about liquid nytrogen and other stuff that was cold. I personally I thought that so far out of the day it was the best.

    The next exhibit we went to was sports. There was so much activities to do there, our community was shocked by how much there was to do. The first thing that I did was the rock climbing, but my shoes were so big that I was struggling to get up. Then I went to the Cathy Freeman race. Her record was 2 seconds for 2 metres, I bet her by a milli second. I kept on playing around until we were so exorsted that it was time to finish.

    As we walked out of ScienceWorks everyone talked about how the enjoyed the day and what wa the best part of the day. What I said was that the best part of the day was definetly the sport exhibit. It is true Scienceworks is great place.

    By Prakashika

  20. Cool stuff show at Science works

    Our school had invited level 4 students to a excursion to Science works.We had already arrived there and saw the lightning show and other little things.Our class then headed to the cool stuff show and I was really excited because the last show was great!

    When we seated ourselves and got ready to watch and learn about and exciting show. A man named Daniel , introduced himself and told a little bit about what the cool stuff show is about.He also explained that the cool stuff show is about changes of state and we needed to know a little bit about matter, luckily we had covered most of it at school already.

    Daniel then took out a strange looking bottle and said that inside is something a little dangerous and so he had to where protective gloves and gogles.I was wondering what it was for a while ,until he finally opened the bottle and gas was coming from the top ,I knew straight away that it was liquid nitrogen.Daniel told our class that the temperature of the room was hot enough to heat up the liquid nitrogen since it was so cold.

    Daniel asked if we knew what would happen if he poured liquid nitrogen into a bowl of water . We said a few suggestions and then he showed us , we waited for a while and the he took a large spoon and showed us that the water had turned to ice. Daniel did the same thing but with some washing liquid it was left with frozen bubbles and it was even hollow!

    He then took a glass bootle and filled it with boiling water and he waited for a while, then poured it out.In the mean time he said he would place it in a bowl of cold water and place a balloon on top , he then did it and the balloon deflated in the bottle.He then did the same thing but filling the bottle with cold water and pouring it out. Then placing it in a bowl of boiling water and the the opposite happened the balloon blew up.Daniel explained that cold water increases the amount of air and boiling water decreases the air amount.

    Daniel showed us a toy and “what is this to do with science,” I thought but it was a ring with a ball and stick all attached together with string. The ball was able to fit in the ring but he put it in liquid nitrogen and waited. In the mean time he asked for some suggestions and I had no idea what was going to happen but he went back to the strange toy and took it out ,he tried placing the ball in the ring. Didn’t fit the ring had shrunk.At the end Daniel tried fitting the ball in the ring and it fit!

    Daniel showed us many things at the cool stuff show I could hardly remember.I had so much fun there and I hope I can come again.I learnt so many things and I’m sure my class did too. When I saw science works I thought it was all fun it turns out that it’s involved a lot of learning.Over all science works was fun and I’d love to come back any time!

    By Jessica

    • Hi Jessica,

      I liked your recount. One of the things I liked on the excursion was going to the Cool Stuff Show it was interesting and I enjoyed what I learnt there.

      From Steven

  21. Hi Jessica, Sounds like Science Works taught you a lot about chemistry and physics. If you are allowed to watch masterchef this week, you might see some more fun things to use in cooking. Hestor Blumenthal is the resident chef for the week so there will be lots of science. Keep learning! From Ms Ash

    • Hi Ms Ash,
      Thank you for the nice advice and I really did enjoy the Science works trip! I did learn lots of things there, I have also seen some Hestor Blumenthal videos and there was a lot of strange science!

      From Jessica

  22. Hi All Science Work reporters, Enjoyed hearing about this awesome excursion. You sure did a heap of learning! Check out my response to Jessica and see if you too can catch Heston working scientifc magic in the kitchen. Regards, Ms Ash

    On Tuesday level 4 went to science works for an excursion. There was lots of different kinds of rooms, such as the lightning room, sports works, cool room and how things work.

    We got on the bus at about 9:00am. It took us about 40mins to get there. When we arrived there we had to go line up with the parent that was taking care of us. When we finished our snack we went to a room called,” how things work”. There were tables set up letting us touch, feel and see. These things showed us how they worked.

    The next room we walked into was the lightning room. The lady called up someone from the audience to show how static electricity works. She called me up, then I had to stand beside this big ball then she told me to take my hair out and then my hair went up it felt really weird. In the cool room I they showed us that when you put liquid nitrogen on a balloon it decreases but when you blow on it really fast it expands.

    After that we went to a room called sports works. When we went in I saw lots of different things. The first thing I tried was rock climbing it was really fun. Then I went to go run alongside Kathy Freeman. There were lots of different areas including how high you can jump, how hard you could pull the rope and how to judge people doing gymnastics.

    After spending a few hours at science works it was time to head back to school. We arrived at school just before 3:15. The highlight of the day was when we went into the cold room because, I liked how the man did lots of different things with the liquid nitrogen.

    By Alana

  24. Dear Alana,

    You had lots of detail and description, but I think you should make some of your sentences shorter by splitting them into two. For example; ‘then I had to stand beside this big ball then she told me to take my hair out and then my hair went up it felt really weird’ could be put into two sentences like; then I had to stand beside this big ball and she told me to take my hair out. My hair went up and it felt really weird.

    From, Lucia

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